Mandarin

So, I've been trying to speak Mandarin to the children as much as I can, whenever I remember. Christian has reached the stage where he is reading English books really well, but his Mandarin ability lags far behind.

Berries helps somewhat, but I usually do not have much time to revise with him the characters he learns..given that we have less than an hour together each day. One day, I found a rare opportunity to bring out the cards and make a game out of it. I told him the aim of the game is to cover the entire bed with the cards, but he can have the cards only if he reads them out accurately. That silly boy actually bought into the game (I wonder how long this gullibility will last).

I shall try to be more creative and come up with more games like that, seeing how he enjoys the challenge and thrill..

Let's go to the beach

One of the children's favourite song to dance and bounce around to is "Let's go to the beach".

It's a repetitive ditty (as most kids songs are), and it goes like that:

Let's go to the beach
It's a sunny, sunny day today..
Let's go to the beach
It's a sunny sunny day today.

Christian hadn't been to his favourite beach in a while, so we decided to take the opportunity one day when it was sunny and we didn't have swim class to go to. The kids were so delighted! Christian dug around in the sand and played with the sand machines at Siloso beach, while Calista mostly watched. I took shelter in the shade, while feeling grateful that P was so hands-on. =P

Christian the Protector

Yesterday, I brought the children down to the playground cos I was home early (took time off to be at the doc's with Christian to discuss allergy testing, but that's a topic for another post).

They ran around and I hung around watching them. Suddenly, I saw Christian running right in front of his sister, standing there with his arms wide open, before noticing that there was a little toddler who was being chided by his mum. I figured out that the toddler must have tried to hit Calista. I smiled at how protective he was of her, and told him how proud I was. He was ever vigilant, and when the toddler didn't give up and tried hitting her again, there Christian went again, putting himself between her and the toddler, shielding her with his body.

Ahh.. this reminds me of that time when he shielded me at the playground too. He has the makings of a gentleman :)

Din Tai Fung

One of our favourite restaurants is Din Tai Fung. I really wish they had a loyalty program because we would definitely chalk up many points and redeem that for lots of free meals if they had one.

One would not anticipate that a Taiwanese dumpling restaurant would be family friendly, but they certainly are, offering cute children cutlery which never fail to excite my children, and child-friendly options. We can specify that we do not want MSG in the food, and request to have less oil and salt in our food, and the servers wouldn't bat an eyelid. I think it's mainly cos they cook individual portions after orders are placed, unlike some other places where food is cooked in large batches.

Our children lurrrve the xiao long bao, which is also very child-friendly in that it is mainly minced meat and easy to chew. Calista can eat 6 on her own. She eats it the proper way too, scooping one dumpling carefully onto her spoon, bringing it close to her lips, piercing a hole in the dumpling skin, sucking the soup out before eating the rest of it.
P and I are pleased whenever we eat there, cos they eat so heartily and we know that none of the usual nasties that accompany outside food (MSG, excessive salt) is getting into them.. ^_^

They certainly deserve their Michelin star for the consistently good food they serve up!

Christian's 5th Birthday

This post is long overdue.. we celebrated Christian's 5th birthday at an indoor playground this year. He had asked for a party, and was careful to specify "I don't mean just bring a cake to school...I mean a party like Andrew had, at SAFRA, remember?"

I considered this request carefully because I do not want him to cave in to peer pressure, and did not want to give in all the time. After some consideration, I realised that we did not have a proper party for him since he was born, and we informed him that if we had a party, the next one he will be having will be in another 5 years' time. I also set 2 conditions for him to fulfill. He had to I) start showering himself and II) stop using diapers at night.

Yes. He is still using diapers at night. I was initially quite ashamed of that fact, and blamed it on lack of effort on my part to train him, but after reading some articles online, learnt that boys are usually slower than girls in this aspect and that night toilet training really depends on the individual being physiologically ready - the bladder must trigger a signal to the brain and wake the child up.. So I stopped putting pressure on him, and thought he'll be ready when his diaper finally stops being wet in the morning.

As for party venues, I had considered having a sports party organised by Shaws, a pirate ship party at Sentosa, and a simple indoor party. I settled for the last cos not all kids might enjoy the sports party (especially the girls in his class?) and also cos my friend pointed out "How are you going to top it if you go for the pirate ship party straightaway?"

So we settled on Fidgets, which looks pretty awesome to me, but was a little inconvenient in its location. It's at Bukit Timah, Turf City which I discovered to be a rather family-friendly place, but not so friendly to those without cars.

Christian had also asked for an Elmo cake and so I looked hard for one. It was tough to find a baker who would do a fresh cream Elmo cake, but I eventually managed to find one who would customise it for me at a very reasonable price.

Here's a few pictures of the big day.. (P and I kept thinking (much like typical parents) "we've never had such a party for ourselves..kids these days are so fortunate..")

Christian certainly looked like he enjoyed himself, playing with his classmates in a different environment, and being the star of the day. We are so happy that he has reached this milestone! Half a decade.. only 3 more of these to go, before he is a full-grown adult.. sigh.

Thank you darling for being such a wonderful son..you are so beautiful and precious to us and we love you more than you can imagine.

Photoshoot 2013 (Part I)

P had a sudden impulse to have a family photoshoot.. I think he was just staring at the kids one day, thought to himself "they are growing so fast", and suggested we go have some photos taken because "that's all we will have to look back on when we grow old and they leave us.." Haha.

So the Chairman comes up with the proposal and the Family CEO (i.e. ME) executes the plan. I looked around some websites, got a few quotes and found that the professionals look really good, but charge exorbitant (in my opinion) prices for the return of all images. And so we looked out for deal coupons. What a lifesaver. We bought 2 coupons, one for an indoor shoot and one for outdoors. I timed the shoots a month apart, to hedge against bad hair days / bad skin week / illness etc.

The indoor shoot was not great.. the photographer had no initiative, no novel suggestions, and kept harping on the fact that Calista refused to smile, even though we told him we were fine with her being her usual moody self in the pictures. We managed to get a few decent photos though, and P thought that it was time well spent. We had fun bonding during the 1 hour, and still had photos to show for it!

More photos from the outdoor shoot coming up in 4 weeks!

Updates (Calista)

 

It’s been a while since I last blogged..it’s hard to find the time and energy to do so these days, but the kids are growing up so quickly I feel wistful, and think I need to capture some of this down somehow.

For mothers, making time usually means forsaking sleep, and that is why I am up an hour earlier than usual.

Calista is now 2 years, almost-4 months. She surprises me with how long she has grown, how she speaks in complete (albeit slightly ungrammatical) sentences.

I called home from work yesterday, cos I called earlier to ask my mum something and heard her voice in the background asking “Is it DADdy???” (Typical daughter-father bias.)

When I called to speak with her, she told me “Mama I want you to read storybook to me…! This one..”

1) She thinks I can see the book she is holding, even though I am not there. Everything is still magical and possible to her.

2) Her mandarin active vocabulary is almost non-existent, other than “baobao” (carry). She speaks almost exclusively in English despite me trying my best to speak Mandarin to her.

My brother is so amused by Calista…her cries often disturb his sleep, and when he asked “Who cried earlier?” she would unashamedly do a “mock-cry” for him.

She is ending playgroup soon, and just attended orientation at her brother’s school, in preparation of going Nursery 1 next year. To think that when I first checked out Christian’s school, she was still comfortably ensconced in my tummy! Sigh.

She enjoyed school, and didn’t shed a tear…it appears that boys are usually the more clingy, crying sort when it comes to separation from familiar surroundings / caretakers.

Not much else has changed, except that her appetite increased, she’s grown taller, has longer hair, has larger eyes, and thus a less-prominent nose. Everybody says she looks like a female version of Christian, but I am not quite able to see it which is ironic given that I stare at them everyday, but maybe precisely cos that is the case.

She is exceedingly vain and has a healthy self-esteem. Loves to dress up and preen in front of the mirror, or show off to us. Made me laugh the other day when she pinched her nose, and moved her fingers to the sofa, saying “I put pretty there ok, you take care”.

Has a soft spot for soft toys and little animals. All I need to do to get her to be quiet is to pretend some soft toy is sleeping. She can usually be tricked into long cuddles by a whine or two from me :)

Her favourite song used to be “Happy Birthday” and I would love at how she valiantly tries to sing the third sentence “Happy BIRTH-day” which goes hiigh up, as if her voice was cracking. The song of the month seems to be the ABC song though. She can remember every bit although she mumbles her way through “LMNOP”.

She’s also into numbers now and can count properly (ie. point to one object at a time as she goes 1 – 2 – 3 –4 ). Can’t recognise the digits yet, but i am in no hurry to try since I know she’ll get there and there’s no point duplicating what the teachers will be teaching her anyway.

Sigh. She is the sweetest darling, who increasingly reminds me of myself when I was young, every day. We are so so glad she chose us to be her parents and decided to come into our lives.

  

Kluang, Part II

I decided to take 3 days off work and bring the kids back to Kluang during the September holidays again.

Considering the options, it worked out best for our situation cos I was not willing to spend on an air ticket for the helper, and air tickets for everyone just to Penang would cost almost a thousand.

We had promised Christian that we would take the train to Malaysia one day, and I took the opportunity to fulfil that promise. Taking the train in was definitely more of a hassle compared to getting my uncle to fetch us, especially since the station had moved from Tanjong Pagar to Woodlands (2 cab rides in the morning to catch the outbound train cost us $60 already). It was definitely a memorable experience for the kids though, who were so excited to be on a railroad train.

It was such a pleasure to get away from the everyday distractions at home and work, and to enjoy the beautiful moments which seem to last just a bit longer in the slower pace of Kluang. I saw Calista as the 2 year old she is now, I witnessed what a true toddler she looks like now, and her cheeky endearing personality that warms strangers towards her.

 

My colleagues probably thought I was wasting my leave in Malaysia, but the trip brought me back to my childhood, when I could laze around and not worry about what I needed to do next. The main activity of each day were – go hiking, go to the hair salon, go for a massage. The time in between those and meals would be spent with the children horsing around in the bedroom, reading or motivating Christian to work on his writing exercises.

Hiking - I enjoyed the cool walk as we ascended the Kluang hill..

We had to leave Calista behind at the foot of the hill with my dad and the helper cos she kept wanting to be carried..Christian, my cousin, my aunt, mum and I proceeded to ascend up till the mid-point of the hill. It was wonderful inhaling the fresh air of the forest, and having the cool air brush against our skin. Christian was also thrilled when my aunt, a regular trekker, showed us the tap from which spring water flowed. The taste of that spring water was so cool and we could feel the energy of the mountain in that gulp.

Christian also loved the job of watering the plants in the garden with a spray can,

climbing up and down the steps with his sister hot on his tails

and horsing around with his granduncles who were so indulgent.

He asked if we could go back next holidays, to climb the stairs in Granduncle’s house and to drink milo.. Gosh. It is sometimes so easy to make children happy.

Nantsuttei

We were introduced to Nantsuttei a year or two ago, and fell in love.

The flavourful ramen with its wholesome broth, the free flow of fresh garlic that comes with a garlic press for us to process ourself (unlike most, we love raw garlic for its immunity-boosting properties), and the posters which assure us they use fresh antibiotic and hormone-free pork, makes this our default weekend lunch place. Christian will inevitably pick Nansuttei over other options whenever we ask him where he would like to eat – he’s just like his Dad, who can eat the same thing over and over again.

Given that this place probably has a firm place in Christian’s childhood memories, I thought it deserves a blog post. We’ve been there countless times, such that his vocabulary now includes the words “Nantsuttei” (the name of the ramen place)  “Itadakimasu” (the name of the area in Parco Millenia which houses the restaurant) and “Buta-manma” (the name of the charsiew rice dish we order for the kids).

Let’s hope it stays around for many more years to come!

Sports Day 2013

Christian’s school organised a sports day for the children a few weeks back, just before the September school holidays.

P had initially said he felt too ill to go, and would stay at home with Calista, but relented in the morning and went along.

It was a beautiful day at Pasir Ris Park that morning, and I admired the teacher’s dedication and efforts in planning the day.

First they did warm-ups to a Chinese pop-kiddy song “Zuo san quan, You san quan, bo zi niu niu pi ku niu niu…”

Then they did the flag-off, and off the children went on their 1.2km run!

He ran, and ran, and I took Calista off P’s arms so P could run part of the distance with him. Christian came in 2nd even though he was standing right behind during the flag-off. He said it was because “Daddy ran with me”. Sigh. Children really appreciate their parents’ presence, even if they don’t say request for it.

After the race proper, we had some activities where the N1 / N2 children hopped in sacks, and the K1/ K2s walked on tin cans.

Christian then had to dress me up in newspaper, and come up with some “sports outfit” for me. Of course, we were much too far away to hear the 2nd part of the instructions and so we had to put a marketing spin on my hat and dress, presenting it as a Quidditch outfit complete with broom. =7

The prize presentation was last and even those who didn’t place in the first 3 positions got a medal round the neck (which I suspect Christian might have preferred, hah.)

It was a happy morning!

More children?

We were in Malaysia and Christian was sleeping in the same room as me. He is usually most thoughtful at night and that night was no different.

Ch: “Mama you are my most loved person in this world.”

Me: *pleased, smiling with crinkly eyes*

Ch: “When you become a mama, are you happy to be one?”

I gave him some spiel that I am almost always happy. Although he and his sister anger or worry me sometimes, I am very happy to have them, most of the time. This reply seemed to satisfy him, but then he continued..

Ch: “Next time when I grow up I will buy a 7-seater car for you.”

I was pleased to hear that and told him I did not need a 7-seater car, but his next proclamation alarmed me somewhat until I clarified it.

Ch: “I will put you in a nice place, and draw you with flowers in the garden, and some insects flying around…”

Me: –_—What?? Oh, you mean draw me in a nice picture?

Ch ignores me and starts getting to the real point that has been bothering him:

“Mama, do you think 2 children is enough?”

Me (thinking his EQ is rather high, to start off with a leading question): “Oh..what makes you ask that? What do you think?”

Ch: “I think 3 is better. If you have 8, I’ll be the biggest.”

I laughed and told him he would always be the biggest, no matter how many children I have. He seemed chuffed at that notion, and I asked why he wanted more children.

“Then I will have more people to play with, not just 2 of us.”

I explained that his Daddy and I feel that we are already not spending enough time with them and to add another child into the mix would mean even less time for them. Christian thought about it a bit and decided on a compromise.

“How about when I am 15? You can have another baby when I am 15 and I can help.”

I burst out laughing again, telling him I’d be 40 years old then, but then realised to my horror that it was still a possibility, even when he is 15, to have another baby.

Decided to cut the conversation short and told him I’ll think about it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I reflected on why this line of questioning came up, and realised he must have overheard my conversation in the car with my cousin, who was remarking how different my life must be now, with 2 kids, and how I must not have time to go out or watch movies etc. Thankfully I gave rather neutral replies, but Christian must still have been bothered to have asked me if I was happy as a mama.. Oh such a darling. I must always remember they are watching and listening even if it appears that they are otherwise preoccupied!

p/s just found out he asked my mum “Popo if you have 3 grandchildren, will you go crazy?”

That scared my mum who asked him “Why?? Is your mama having another baby??!”

Uma’s birthday

We went for Uma’s birthday party at Amazonia, Great World City about a month back.

Uma is Christian’s classmate; she happens to be half-Japanese and I think she is a pretty girly-girl :)

It was our first time at Amazonia (most of our visits to indoor playgrounds are a result of his classmates’ birthday celebrations) and it was less impressed than I imagined it to be but Christian disappeared in the play structure the minute we arrived and I enjoyed seeing his exhilarated self playing with his usual playmates outside of their usual venue.

Calista had fun at the baby play area for below-3s..and I spent most of my time watching her watch others. Her favourite activity was to pick up the balls that were strewn all over the floor, and return them to the ball pit. =/

Hopefully his classmates don’t suffer from “indoor playground fatigue” and enjoy his party this Saturday too!

P’s first letter to the children

Why do mama and daddy quarrel?

From time to time, this question is bound to pop up in your innocent minds.

Why do 2 persons who are clearly in love with each other, whose interests are aligned in most respects, get into squabbles that sometimes turn furious?

The answer is simple: The basic reason that people argue is that not everyone thinks or sees things in the same way.

Differences in perception tend to get magnified by differences in personalities.

And differences in personalities are, fortunately or unfortunately, what draws two people together (either in friendship or in love) in the first place. Hence the popularisation of the term: “opposites attract”.

Your mama is an observer, and your daddy is a thinker.

Mama is good (very good) at paying attention to, and remembering, what is said or done. That is why she makes a good blogger – not everyone can remember in minute detail and render in vibrant colours the mundane happenings of the day. Her heightened sense of observation causes her to be sensitive to perceived inadequacies/ineptitudes (e.g., Why are you so slow/forgetful? Get on with the program!), vulnerable to praise/insults and eager to hold others to their promises.

Daddy is adept at generating ideas (both good and bad ones). Like many men, his mind tends to focus on problems and solutions rather than people, words, events, dates or emotions. Very little is taken at face value, almost everything perceived by the senses is associated, classified and analysed (e.g., You must be slow/forgetful because you suffer from some deficiency in minerals. Let me find some way to remedy that.). A minor observation (Mama saying that Christian was inattentive in class today) can lead to a thesis on what the problem is likely to be, what root cause of the problem is, and what we need to do as parents.

As you must be aware by now, neither of your parents are do-ers by nature. This is an obvious source of grief for Mama (who constantly berates daddy for his obvious lack of interest in planning his life on an hour-by-hour basis) and Daddy (who gets into a lot of anguish whenever he remembers ideas that were neglected or not implemented).

It is important to recognise the effect that differences in personalities can have, because we have found that, from as early as birth, Kor Kor is a thinker (like Daddy) and Mei Mei is an observer (like Mama).

Christian’s personality explains why he is inattentive (daydreams) in class and loves to talk about the impossible or the future – “I am Flash! Zooooom!” “When I am a Daddy, I will call my son Eric” “When I grow up I will stay with Mama and give her all of my $$$”. Son, a piece of advice: The great danger in always speaking about the future (not that you can help it) is that your Mama the observer will recall everything you say (to us, only an expression of our sincere hope) as a PROMISE/GUARANTEE.

Mei mei’s personality explains why she loves to be a spectator. Her favourite phrases include “I want play the playground!” (euphemism for people-watching) “I want to see the children” “I want see meow meow” and “I want to see birds”.

Identifying and understanding your differences in personalities is key to many aspects of managing your lives. For starters, Daddy anticipates that you will experience a lot of frustration with each other in the future, even though (like Daddy and Mama) you love each other very much. This is because Mei Mei will see more at the skin-deep level (which Kor Kor does not care about), whereas Kor Kor will tend to over-analyze things (which Mei Mei does not get).

It may seem counterintuitive, but the differences in personalities also explain why Calista “prefers” the company of Daddy and Christian wants to be near Mama. There is affinity between observers and thinkers because observers are amused and entertained by the antics of the thinkers, whereas thinkers find the stability and companionship of observers attractive. Ironically, it is more difficult for two persons of the same personality to be comfortable with each other, because they occupy the same space and find less room to express themselves.

By observing the two of you in your most guileless, unrestrained and larger-than-life forms, we have learnt much about ourselves and each other. It is almost as if God has given us a time machine to see ourselves as you are.

Because of our own experiences in life, knowing that you guys share our personalities helps us as parents, in terms of understanding, managing and developing you. In striving to treat you as fairly and equally as possible (however unrealistic this might be), we have to be mindful that you stand to benefit most from activities that are suited to your different personalities.

Our observation is that Christian is happiest when engaging his creative/imaginative side (e.g., constructing Lego models, making “cake” or “chocolate”, going for art classes). We will try to let him have more exposure to activities involving design and initiative.

Calista enjoys observing, internalising and retrieving – traits well suited for music/dance and speech and drama. We will try to let her engage in activities that make good use of her memory and eye for detail.

In times when one or both of you experience anger, frustration or hurt with each other, we hope that you will have a chance to read this and remember how you are made differently, and be able draw on Mama and Daddy’s experience in overcoming each other’s differences.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Editor’s / Mama’s note: Boy was I impressed when your Daddy sent me this. So insightful and what an interesting read. Your Daddy and I do complement each other, and if he keeps this up, our blog will be a nice mix of blog posts narrating the everyday, and thought-provoking posts like the above. I only have one point to add though, and that is a word of caution – Nobody is one dimensional, and nobody can get through life simply by being a Thinker, a Doer or an Observer.

So, we need to be mindful that we cannot hide behind personality labels and use that as an excuse for avoiding things that do not come so naturally to us. Labels only help to identify our natural inclinations, but we need to work at developing our weaknesses after they are identified.

For example, I come up with lots of to-do lists at work and also when managing personal errands. This helps me to keep track of things and trains me to be more of a doer by giving me a sense of accomplishment whenever I tick a task off the list.

Oh well you are probably tired of this letter by now. Thank you for reading this far and hopefully some of this will get you thinking about personalities, relationships, and attitude in life.

Lots of love,

Daddy and Mama

Girlfriend

Following from my previous post about how Christian thinks he will go search for a girlfriend at age 20 so his “children can have a mama”, it appears that he has already decided who his girlfriend is at the grand old age of 4+.

This happened back in June but I haven’t had the time to blog about it till now.

I called home from work, wanting to speak to him. My mum picked the phone up and teased him before passing the phone to him, saying “Christian, it’s your girlfriend is looking for you.”

I heard his voice as he approached the phone:

“Mama, is it you?”

I said cryptically:
“Hello Christian”

C: “Who is this?”

Popo whispers by his side: “Your girlfriend.”

C: “Is this Nicole?”

-_-

(Nicole is the alpha female of his class who he has somehow identified as his girlfrined..)

Touched

We had a big lunch last Sunday, cos of Popo’s birthday. I went into food coma and fell asleep on way home, crashing into bed once we reached home.

Christian followed me into the room, with his sister behind him. He nattered away but paused in mid-sentence and suddenly said ‘Wait.’ with his palms faced outwards.

With a serious look on his face, he proceeded to dig out the folded blanket far away from me, dragging it over and clumsily truing to open it up to cover me.

I went “Awww…” in my sleepy state but he went further, leading his sister out saying “Come let’s go out, let’s not disturb mama.”

A part of me is happy he is finally thinking for others, and yet I am a little sad that the self-centred toddler/preschooler is partially gone.

Sigh. The great contradiction of parenting.

Mama sing a song for me

My 2 year old daughter had a request when I was putting her to sleep today. She said

“mama sing song for me”.

I was a little taken off guard and made an internal note of how her sentences are becoming more complete with each passing day.

She turned her back to me and hugged her bolster when I told her I would sing her a song only if she closed her eyes.

I sang her “Fly me to the moon” and she immediately turned back to face me - “what is that mama?” She had never heard that one before..I had been mostly singing nursery rhymes to her.

I sang her “Lover’s concerto” next and she listened contentedly to it. It really has the perfect slow rhythm suitable for lulling one to sleep. As I sang, it occurred to me that this was Christian’s favourite bedtime lullaby. He used to request it all the time, sing it together with me and fall asleep in mid-song. Ahhh…i can’t remember if we ever managed to record his singing, and even if we did I doubt I’d be able to locate that amidst thousands of videos.

Here’s the lyrics for you son, if you are reading this sometime in the future -

So gentle is the rain

That falls gently on the meadow

Birds high up in the trees,

Serenade the clouds with their melody

Oh! See there beyond the hills

The bright colours of the rainbow

Some magic from above

Made this day for us

Just to fall in love

You hold me in your arms

And say once again you love me

And if your love is true

Everything will be just as wonderful

Love,

Your “Daisy”

(Daisy is Ch’s term of endearment for me..when asked why, he said “like Daisy the cow in Jack and the beanstalk, remember? –_--)

Daddy’s girl

2 nights ago, I was messaging P and he got inspired to sms his sister as a result of what I told him. He gave me permission to reproduce the sms-es cos he thinks it would be useful for our children to understand our philosophy as parents, in future.

Here’s what he said to his sis:

“Calista had a high fever and vomited today. She was mostly silent, but when E (i.e. me) tried to sayang her and told her she loved her, her reply was “Where is Daddy?”

Having a boy and a girl has made me realise that boys instinctively look to mothers for comfort, and it is the other way round for girls.

I feel really sorry for dad, he did not know how to cherish his daughter. He wasted the special gift that God gave him…the opportunity to develop that special relationship, that unbreakable bond with another person. I also felt sad for you, you missed out on the special love between daddy and daughter Unfortunately for dad, he shows no signs of having learned to love, as evidenced by his lack of interest in his own grandchildren.

My greatest fear for him is the regret that he will feel on his last day.my greatest wish for him is that he can one day reconcile with you, and cure your hurt. Sad to say, this has to come from him, and I do not see it happening.

As a dad i’ve come to realise that children are extremely sensitive to the tenderness of their parents. They really appreciate it when we do for them what the maid usually does. Doing the mundane things in a tender manner, like wiping their backside after they poo and sponge bathing them, makes them feel special and loved. During the weekends, I try to bathe and clean the kids myself as much as possible

It is such a joy to see the delight on their faces when we do simple things for them that seem magical to them, like frying an egg for Christian the foodie.

I thought I should share this with you, so that when your long working hours tire you out and you feel sapped of energy at home, and cannot keep up with the kids’ energy and demands, you can find strength in your love for them, and theirs for you.

I find that aside from this, what really drives me on no matter how tired I am is the memory of my own childhood. For I am determined not to repeat the mistakes of our parents in not projecting their love in a visible way. Although I cannot be there for them most of the time, I hope they can feel that my love is with them. After all, we will be gone one day and all they will have that’s left of us is the love that still resides within them.

And that is the force that will keep them going, through the good and the bad times.”

He shared it with me and I though it was so touching and eloquent.

A night later, I told Calista “I love you…and God loves you too.” Her immediate reply without prompting was -

“I love Daddy.” =7

At MBS

We skipped swim class last Saturday cos Christian was ill. We were at a loss as to where to go, and eventually decided to go to Marina Bay Sands since there was a festival going on that weekend and there would be face painting, balloon sculpting etc.

The children were delighted with the boardwalk at the promenade, and were fascinated with the Oculus. Christian stared at the whirlpool, and we ran to the basement to follow the flow of the water.

We decided to have breakfast at Coffee Bean’s beanstro, where we could watch the waterfall for awhile.

Next, we headed to my office to test out the gym ball I’ve bought together with my colleagues. At one point in time, others could see from the ground floor, my colleagues and I sitting on 3 red balls, all in a row.

After testing out the gym ball to see whether it suited P, we headed over to the museum.

I had read on some mummy’s blog that the Eames Essential exhibition was interesting and had more interactive displays for children. We paid for the kids and I (the proceeds were going to charity that weekend) and explored the life of the makers of the Herman Miller chairs.

This exhibition was definitely not as accessible to children as the Art Garden. Some of what was on display was also beyond me! A lot of it focused on the wonders of mathematics and physics, both of which were definitely one of my weaker subjects back in school. We spent a lot of time at an exhibit which was modeled to look like an outdoor garden.

 Christian had fun playing with the blocks there, and Calista had a good time running around, feeling the “grass”.

There was this machine which simulated the orbit of the planets and the effect of gravity on the speed of orbit. That was a favourite with Christian. We also spent some time at the “House of Cards” exhibit and tried to construct something with the cards available.

The last stop was the activity centre, where we were encouraged to help ourselves to a buffet of material, and construct something out of scrap material. That was fun, and I wish we had more time, but everybody was getting hungry so we did something really simple and headed off for lunch.

We settled on Kraze burgers for lunch. Although it was pretty crowded, we didn’t have queue for a table, unlike Din Tai Fung. It was also near the skating rink so the children were entertained by people watching. We were also pleasantly surprised when a balloon sculpturist approached us and asked if the children would like to have something. Apparently he was hired by the restaurant to offer the service free to guests :) Christian asked for a gun and Calista got a flower..the two of them were most pleased with it and carried it themselves all the way home.

And that, is the end of that very long story of how we spent last Saturday morning.

Christian the soapmaker

I read on some mummy’s blog a year back, about her son’s experience with making soap as a gift for his teachers. I thought it was a great idea and filed it away under the long list of  “Mummy To-dos”.

It was one of the rare to-dos that I remembered to follow up on, so long after. Signing up with Soap Ministry was easy, I just gave a call and made an appointment; no deposits or internet transfers necessary. Great for the busy working mum.

We went today, for the 1145 class and were fortunate to have the sole attention of Dayana, who runs the shop with her mum.

It was such a pleasure to watch the expressions on Christian’s face as he was asked to pick the soap base (milky or clear), essential oil (sweet orange, lavender or lemongrass), colouring (purple or orange or blue). The expressions ranged mostly from joy to pride to focus.

First, he used a metal cutter to slice the soap base into strips,

transferred the strips to a measuring jug which then went into a metal pot simmering over another base of hot water.

 

While the base was melting slowly, Christian was given the opportunity to measure the vegetable glycerin (8g),

  add in vitamin E (1g) and stir in the colouring (red and yellow = orange).

He was then asked to select the scents, and taught to use the dropper to transfer the oil into the measuring jug.

He eventually warmed up to Dayana and ran around looking at the different soap samples on display, before running to the metal pots asking “Are they ready yet?!”

She laughed and was really friendly, teasing him and giving him the space and freedom to try things out himself.

We picked out some moulds which we thought his teacher might like. Roses, hearts with flowers, more roses. Dayana asked him to pick a few moulds for himself too, just in case we have enough soap base left over for ourselves and he predictably picked the car mould =7 After spraying some ethanol on the moulds,

he mixed the soap base with the vit E etc

 

and poured the mixture into the moulds. There were enough for his 7 teachers (2 english, 2 mandarin, 1 assistant, 2 berries teachers) and there was leftover to make his lollipop, car and heart shape.                 

The moulds were placed in the freezer for about 10 minutes and he got to pop the soap out of the moulds.

Ta-daaaa! The finished products.