Am filled with gratitude and awe at how wonderful God is. He is not an abstract, faraway notion, but is active and present in my life.
After resigning last Friday, my mind was still filled with niggling doubt and worry.. "Did i do the right thing?" "Am I killing my career prematurely?" "Will I ever be able to get back to the workforce?" "Will we be able to afford a nice house for our children in future?" "What if the rainy day comes and we don't have enough savings?" "I love my children.. but but but...."
Inwardly, I sent a silent prayer up to God..a prayer so silent that it was buried in my subconscious. Please send a sign so that I know this is the right path to take..that this is pleasing to You, that this is Your will for me too.
(I had previously already come across many random occurrences which led me to believe that He approved of this step. Friends would send me links to marriage articles which came from a Christian stay home mum website, with a mission statement "To encourage and build up Christian Stay-At-Home-Moms" right on top of its homepage. I would read my regular mummy blogs and come across posts which expound on the virtues of being your child's teacher, that staying home is not a waste of education.. The recent debate on http://www.babble.com/ re: stay home mums which arose as a result of some American politician's wife's statement that the opponent's wife "stayed home with her children and never worked a day in her life" also helped to crystalise the arguments for staying home. But I was greedy and sent up the subconscious prayer even after resigning. I was insecure and a worry-wart.)
And so, when I googled "Sunday school", researching for Christian, I was taken aback when I clicked on the most innocuous link and read the following post which was posted in 2007 (i hope the forummer pardons my reproducing her post) -
"Hi mums,
I'm a mother of 3 yr old boy. Been a Christian for 20+ yrs but feeling kinda down lately. Hope that thru this place, we can share encouragement for one another.
Just to share how important mums are to our kids - my church's last sunday sermon on 2nd Timothy, Paul wrote to Timothy says:
"I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also." 2 Timothy 1:5
What an impact a mother can have on her children that others can see!"
Seeing my name in there was like having God rap his knuckles on my head, saying "There, Eunice! There you have it from me!"
What more can I ask for. Thank you Lord!
31 May 2012
The Coastal Settlement
Brought Christian to check out the recently-opened Pasir Ris Swimming Complex on two Saturdays ago..he was a little scared of the water that would fall out of a big tub which tipped over every now and then, but was quite fearless when he saw me having fun on the adult water slides and wanted to go on the same. =7 We didn't spend too long there since all he wanted to do after a while was to hang out at the sides of the pool with mama and daddy..
He was really hungry after the swim though, and it was all i could do to pull him away from the MacDonald's outlet at the complex and convince him we were going for a yummy dinner elsewhere.
We abandoned thoughts of White Sands and the Pasir Ris park food outlets in favour of The Coastal Settlement at Netheravon Road.. So glad we went..the place was tucked away in what seemed like a half-forgotten area of Singapore. There were Vespas parked outside the single-storey restaurant, abandoned carousel horses and swings strewn in the greenery right in front of the place, and even some retired kiddy rides were left in the open.
It was too bad that we couldn't stay longer, cos i needed to rush home to put Calista to bed. But we've already made plans to go back for P's birthday, to try their desserts :)
He was really hungry after the swim though, and it was all i could do to pull him away from the MacDonald's outlet at the complex and convince him we were going for a yummy dinner elsewhere.
We abandoned thoughts of White Sands and the Pasir Ris park food outlets in favour of The Coastal Settlement at Netheravon Road.. So glad we went..the place was tucked away in what seemed like a half-forgotten area of Singapore. There were Vespas parked outside the single-storey restaurant, abandoned carousel horses and swings strewn in the greenery right in front of the place, and even some retired kiddy rides were left in the open.
The restaurant itself was an eclectic mix of curios, chandeliers and retro 60s memorabilia. Life felt perfect, as we lounged on the sofa seats listening to two old men on the guitars singing jazz classics, feasted on superbly done wagyu beef and fresh wild mushroom pizza, and looked out of the full-length windows into a picturesque eye-soothing green. We also enjoyed their great service and free valet parking..
26 May 2012
Zoo trip 2012
The first time we brought Christian to the zoo during the Chinese New Year in 2010, he was a wee toddler who wasn't very interested in the animals (only popcorn), who played at the waterplay area at the end and fell asleep in the pram hugging a 1.5l bottle as his bolster.
We brought him to the zoo again on Thursday, our 2nd trip after that not-very-successful 1st attempt. He really enjoyed it and was so excited about meeting the tigers, lions, lemurs...all thanks to the school which had tons of activities surrounding the theme of "animals" in the past 5 weeks, and had built up the suspense for the 'amazing race' around the zoo by prepping them for the riddles..
"What has a long neck, long legs and eats plants?"
I was so glad that P took the morning off to accompany us at the very last minute, after he was worried about me driving such a long distance to the zoo. Hah. I think i could have gotten us to the zoo safely, but there's no harm in acting a little incapable now and then, and getting the help of the husband.
Teacher D proposed that the children draw themselves and their fathers on a special piece of plastic which she then made a keychain of - it shrinks and turns hard after being baked in the oven.
P saw that 'he' was coloured green in the keychain, and realised that Christian decided to do so because that is his designated 'favourite' colour. (Ch loves blue, and refuses to let his father like the same colour as him, and has since a looong time ago said that his father's favourite colour is green, even though it's not true. P says that the colour is growing on him though..and he has ever more reason to love it now.) Teacher D pointed out that Ch is in blue cos it's his favourite colour, and he coloured the shoes red cos he happened to be wearing red shoes that day. We were impressed cos we did not realise that Christian was capable of even drawing stick figures. She divulged that Ch initially wanted to put the arms sticking out the ears, before she intervened and asked him where would be a more appropriate place. She also told us that he was the only one in his class who insisted that there be shoulders, so his stick figures have arms which jut out a little, before continuing downwards.
As for me, I got a bracelet made of beads that he thread with a fine nylon string. After seeing these, and the various artwork he brought home from school, we think Teacher D is a genius and am convinced he does not need art enrichment lessons at this preschool stage. :)
We brought him to the zoo again on Thursday, our 2nd trip after that not-very-successful 1st attempt. He really enjoyed it and was so excited about meeting the tigers, lions, lemurs...all thanks to the school which had tons of activities surrounding the theme of "animals" in the past 5 weeks, and had built up the suspense for the 'amazing race' around the zoo by prepping them for the riddles..
"What has a long neck, long legs and eats plants?"
I was so glad that P took the morning off to accompany us at the very last minute, after he was worried about me driving such a long distance to the zoo. Hah. I think i could have gotten us to the zoo safely, but there's no harm in acting a little incapable now and then, and getting the help of the husband.
Thank goodness P went too, cos Ch got tired towards the end and asked to sit on his shoulders. The race ended at Kidzworld, the waterplay area..but Christian was afraid of the water tub that would splash water periodically, and resolutely refused to go in even though I assured him that I would go in with him.
Oh well.
The day ended with Teacher D presenting us with our Mother's and Father's Day presents. P was so touched when he saw his present that he was at a loss for words and I joked to Teacher D that he was probably about to cry.
Teacher D proposed that the children draw themselves and their fathers on a special piece of plastic which she then made a keychain of - it shrinks and turns hard after being baked in the oven.
P saw that 'he' was coloured green in the keychain, and realised that Christian decided to do so because that is his designated 'favourite' colour. (Ch loves blue, and refuses to let his father like the same colour as him, and has since a looong time ago said that his father's favourite colour is green, even though it's not true. P says that the colour is growing on him though..and he has ever more reason to love it now.) Teacher D pointed out that Ch is in blue cos it's his favourite colour, and he coloured the shoes red cos he happened to be wearing red shoes that day. We were impressed cos we did not realise that Christian was capable of even drawing stick figures. She divulged that Ch initially wanted to put the arms sticking out the ears, before she intervened and asked him where would be a more appropriate place. She also told us that he was the only one in his class who insisted that there be shoulders, so his stick figures have arms which jut out a little, before continuing downwards.
As for me, I got a bracelet made of beads that he thread with a fine nylon string. After seeing these, and the various artwork he brought home from school, we think Teacher D is a genius and am convinced he does not need art enrichment lessons at this preschool stage. :)
25 May 2012
Staying Home
I took leave a week ago to bring Christian to his classmate's bday party. It was held at Pizitalia, at East Coast Seafood Centre. He had lots of fun at the indoor playground altho he was initially paralysed by fear after discovering a humongous replica which could move its head and forelimbs..
I was so busy the rest of the day..showering him, putting him down for a nap, playing and entertaining calista, playing puzzles n tangrams with christian, bathing calista, bringing Christian down to the playground and convincing him to give his skate scooter another try..reading to him n putting calista down to sleep..that I missed P's calls and didn't have a chance to check my hp till both of them were in bed.
Sigh. I need not wonder what the life of a stay home mum is. It is without a doubt, tough and filled with repetition.
But.
Seeing how pleased Christian was as we took turns spinning each other at the playground..seeing how confident he grew gliding on his skate scooter after I placed my hand and guided him around turns..seeing how thrilled he was when I pretended to be the train engineer who needed to chase the train (him) cos the engine was in need of repair (by tickling his sides)..hearing him say at the party "I give you the bigger piece of chicken mama, because i love you.."
Watching Calista laugh and seeing her face all lit up as I play with her or reach to carry her after she beckons..
I think life at home would force me to focus less on myself..but oh, how fulfilling that life will be.
(I just tendered my resignation today to stay home for a few months. A little sad to be leaving after so long, but at the same time, am happy and excited about the new chapter of my life. Am so thankful to P for his support (he even suggested typing my letter for me cos I was dragging my feet and hesitant for so long).)
I was so busy the rest of the day..showering him, putting him down for a nap, playing and entertaining calista, playing puzzles n tangrams with christian, bathing calista, bringing Christian down to the playground and convincing him to give his skate scooter another try..reading to him n putting calista down to sleep..that I missed P's calls and didn't have a chance to check my hp till both of them were in bed.
Sigh. I need not wonder what the life of a stay home mum is. It is without a doubt, tough and filled with repetition.
But.
Seeing how pleased Christian was as we took turns spinning each other at the playground..seeing how confident he grew gliding on his skate scooter after I placed my hand and guided him around turns..seeing how thrilled he was when I pretended to be the train engineer who needed to chase the train (him) cos the engine was in need of repair (by tickling his sides)..hearing him say at the party "I give you the bigger piece of chicken mama, because i love you.."
Watching Calista laugh and seeing her face all lit up as I play with her or reach to carry her after she beckons..
I think life at home would force me to focus less on myself..but oh, how fulfilling that life will be.
(I just tendered my resignation today to stay home for a few months. A little sad to be leaving after so long, but at the same time, am happy and excited about the new chapter of my life. Am so thankful to P for his support (he even suggested typing my letter for me cos I was dragging my feet and hesitant for so long).)
19 May 2012
A report of the 1st 5 weeks at Ch's new school
We went to meet Christian's teachers today. He only started at this new school last month, on the 17th, but the teachers already demonstrated a good understanding of our son, his personality, his quirks, and they even remember the exact things he says.
I heard from Teacher D that he has settled well in class, he interacts well with his friends and knows the routine of school. This is peppered with lots of anecdotes about what he does and says in school. For example, he used to ask Teacher D why HW cries.."it's so loud...". Teacher D explains that HW (an autistic child) has not learnt to speak yet, so he cries when he is upset (which is exactly the explanation I would have given.) She taught Christian how to react, by giving the same commands the other children give when HW cries "Pocket. Handkerchief. Wipe." and HW calms down quickly with the consistent response. Apparently, our son discovered that HW gets upset when the children leave the breakfast table to play, leaving him all alone and he can't even view the children cos there is a shelf in between the breakfast table and the play area. So Christian learnt to placate HW by bringing a pile of toys and leaving it at a corner within HW's line of sight, and telling HW that he has reserved some toys for him to play. And HW is happy. :)
The theme in school for the past few weeks was that of animals and pets. The children got to discuss what pets they each wanted, whether certain animals were suited to be pets.. whether they could fit an ostrich in a cage, whether they would be happy if they were caged.. in the course of their discussion, they would go off-topic and talk about foxes and hens in coops before Teacher D gives a summary of what they had talked about. We heard how Teacher D taught Christian to draw a goldfish, hamster and a parrot with step-by-step instructions. I was so surprised that those animals within the jotterbook were drawn by him. I think this is possible only because there are so few students in his class (and made me glad i didn't send him to the ubiquitous PCF kindy.) I also saw another jigsaw puzzle which the teachers drew on and he coloured with a variety of materials - markers, watercolour...Having seen all that, i realise there is no need to send him for art enrichment classes. :)
Teacher D told us how they train pre-writing skills with crayons, markers and a special triangular-grip pencil. She also pointed to some bird houses the children made with ice cream sticks. She described how she asked the children to count 20 sticks out, in groups of 4, and how she showed him to use 4 sticks for one side of the roof, another 4 sticks for the other side, 4 sticks for the base etc etc. It's brilliant, how she incorporates counting and grouping into artwork, at the same time demonstrating the practical uses of numbers.
We heard of the friendly competition between the children. Apparently, Teacher D has word strips and word cards of the words in the book..she jumbles them up and asks them to pick out the correct sentence.. or to form a sentence with the word cards. She's also making a point to ask them to point to the words as they read, and would flash the page to them before asking them which sentence appeared on that page. The children also take turns reading to each other.. and have even taken to challenging each other - "Can you read this word?" "i can read this page!" Teacher D talked about how she creates anticipation for the nice book in the Oxford Reading Tree series, and how she rewards the children who read well by allowing them to read the animated version of the book on the laptop.
Huang Lao Shi told us how A, the smartest boy in class, was a little intimidated by Christian's proficiency in recognising chinese characters, but has now gotten used to it and has started trying to 'reclaim' attention by jumping in to answer as well.
Christian and A apparently share a similar passion for food, and had such fun discussing their favourite foods and fruits..it was hilarious hearing Teacher D talk about the other boy who felt a little left out (cos he only likes to eat meat and nothing else) trying to butt in by repeating himself "i like chicken! i like chicken!" =7
Teacher D also mentioned that Christian would occasionally ask her if there was going to be any writing that day, if they were going to do any table work.. I was surprised to hear him so enthusiastic about sitting down and 'working'..but I take it as a very good sign.
I can't remember what else was said already, but i just remember feeling very pleased that my multi-week school hunt was not in vain. P said it surpassed all expectations, and our son seems to have found a best friend and attained self-realisation. What else can he ask for?
The school is visiting the zoo together with the parents this Thursday, as a culmination of the theme on animals. It's just nice, for I was thinking of bringing him myself.. but just couldn't find the time.
They've done a much better job of teaching him than what I would be able to achieve if i homeschooled him. I am so so so thankful..to the woman who first shared about this school on the forum, and to God for showing me the way to this school..
I heard from Teacher D that he has settled well in class, he interacts well with his friends and knows the routine of school. This is peppered with lots of anecdotes about what he does and says in school. For example, he used to ask Teacher D why HW cries.."it's so loud...". Teacher D explains that HW (an autistic child) has not learnt to speak yet, so he cries when he is upset (which is exactly the explanation I would have given.) She taught Christian how to react, by giving the same commands the other children give when HW cries "Pocket. Handkerchief. Wipe." and HW calms down quickly with the consistent response. Apparently, our son discovered that HW gets upset when the children leave the breakfast table to play, leaving him all alone and he can't even view the children cos there is a shelf in between the breakfast table and the play area. So Christian learnt to placate HW by bringing a pile of toys and leaving it at a corner within HW's line of sight, and telling HW that he has reserved some toys for him to play. And HW is happy. :)
The theme in school for the past few weeks was that of animals and pets. The children got to discuss what pets they each wanted, whether certain animals were suited to be pets.. whether they could fit an ostrich in a cage, whether they would be happy if they were caged.. in the course of their discussion, they would go off-topic and talk about foxes and hens in coops before Teacher D gives a summary of what they had talked about. We heard how Teacher D taught Christian to draw a goldfish, hamster and a parrot with step-by-step instructions. I was so surprised that those animals within the jotterbook were drawn by him. I think this is possible only because there are so few students in his class (and made me glad i didn't send him to the ubiquitous PCF kindy.) I also saw another jigsaw puzzle which the teachers drew on and he coloured with a variety of materials - markers, watercolour...Having seen all that, i realise there is no need to send him for art enrichment classes. :)
Teacher D told us how they train pre-writing skills with crayons, markers and a special triangular-grip pencil. She also pointed to some bird houses the children made with ice cream sticks. She described how she asked the children to count 20 sticks out, in groups of 4, and how she showed him to use 4 sticks for one side of the roof, another 4 sticks for the other side, 4 sticks for the base etc etc. It's brilliant, how she incorporates counting and grouping into artwork, at the same time demonstrating the practical uses of numbers.
We heard of the friendly competition between the children. Apparently, Teacher D has word strips and word cards of the words in the book..she jumbles them up and asks them to pick out the correct sentence.. or to form a sentence with the word cards. She's also making a point to ask them to point to the words as they read, and would flash the page to them before asking them which sentence appeared on that page. The children also take turns reading to each other.. and have even taken to challenging each other - "Can you read this word?" "i can read this page!" Teacher D talked about how she creates anticipation for the nice book in the Oxford Reading Tree series, and how she rewards the children who read well by allowing them to read the animated version of the book on the laptop.
Huang Lao Shi told us how A, the smartest boy in class, was a little intimidated by Christian's proficiency in recognising chinese characters, but has now gotten used to it and has started trying to 'reclaim' attention by jumping in to answer as well.
Christian and A apparently share a similar passion for food, and had such fun discussing their favourite foods and fruits..it was hilarious hearing Teacher D talk about the other boy who felt a little left out (cos he only likes to eat meat and nothing else) trying to butt in by repeating himself "i like chicken! i like chicken!" =7
Teacher D also mentioned that Christian would occasionally ask her if there was going to be any writing that day, if they were going to do any table work.. I was surprised to hear him so enthusiastic about sitting down and 'working'..but I take it as a very good sign.
I can't remember what else was said already, but i just remember feeling very pleased that my multi-week school hunt was not in vain. P said it surpassed all expectations, and our son seems to have found a best friend and attained self-realisation. What else can he ask for?
The school is visiting the zoo together with the parents this Thursday, as a culmination of the theme on animals. It's just nice, for I was thinking of bringing him myself.. but just couldn't find the time.
They've done a much better job of teaching him than what I would be able to achieve if i homeschooled him. I am so so so thankful..to the woman who first shared about this school on the forum, and to God for showing me the way to this school..
18 May 2012
My perfect 10
Dear Calista
A few days ago, I was thinking about this letter to you, thinking that I wouldn't have much to update..but today, just a day before you turn 10 months old, I realise I have sooo much to document I don't know where to start.
I had forgotten what 9+ month old babies were like.. but having spent a bit more time with you these two days, I am being reminded of what a cute time this is.
For one, your cognitive development has accelerated so rapidly that we are able to communicate beyond 'mum-mums' now. You call me, yes me (and not my boobs, or milk) "Meh meh" or "Mah Meh". I figured this out because you were calling out to me to carry you the other day when I was leaving for work. I think I might have mentioned this already, but you seem to be ever more clingy and endearing each day. The minute I step home from work, you will whine and go 'meh meh meh' until i carry you. Any attempt by others to take you off my hands will be swatted away by you, and when i do eventually hand you over so i can go shower, i cringe at your wails of protest and slink away to have a rapid shower.
Oh. Speaking of which, I feel soooo guilty leaving you behind these days. You'd initially be so excited when you see me in non-home clothes, at the door.. you'd kick and laugh and think we are going out.. but when I say bye and slowly walk away, you'd fall silent and give me the most resigned / forlorn look which breaks my heart. Sigh. Sometimes you'd even cry, and I can't help but postpone the farewell by asking Ida to bring you downstairs so you can walk me a little to the bus-stop or carpark. =S Just last night, you got 'jealous' (?) every time I hugged or kissed your brother. You'd pause, blink, and then crawl rapidly over and paw me..instantly going back to whatever captured your attention once I stop hugging korkor. Hmm.
Erm, back to cognitive development. You have a greater understanding of words and requests..your waves of 'bye' have evolved from an initial 'Hitler salute' to a slight fanning left-right-left with your hand, to an indonesian traditional dancer move. It is now a proper wave and you often do that everytime I carry you, as if to signal to everyone, "I'm going out with my mama now!" I tried to teach you to blow a kiss, but your mouth opens to eat your fingers every time I bring your hand to your mouth. It's hilarious.
You call everybody else, or address every other thing as a rather rude 'WEH.' or 'EH.' This can mean anything from 'Hello, cat', 'Hello, brother', 'Pass that', to 'i'm here'. =7
I thought of teaching you more commands, so we played the game of "Give mama" today..I placed a toy in your hand, then asked you to "Give mama". The first time you did it, i exclaimed and clapped and you were so pleased, though you looked as if you weren't sure what you did to please mama so. We repeated it a few times, and you started dropping the item on the floor. I withheld praise in those instances, so you'd understand that "Give" doesnt simply mean "giving it up" but "placing in XX's hands". You are a pretty smart cookie cos you got it in one session. Earlier tonight, before sleeping, I only had to say "Give mama" and you immediately dropped the vicks you were mouthing, into my hand. *grin* It made me laugh to see you comply automatically, a little startled with your mouth still open. This is proving to be a very useful command for me.
You've shown a great interest in books..you would make a lunge every time a book is in sight and yowl if we take it away from you for fear that you'd tear it apart..
As for temperament, i'm quite relieved to find you rather even-tempered...although I'm beginning to see flashes of personality..you've started crying when you don't get your way, when we take things away from you so you stop mouthing them etc etc..i am not looking forward to the inevitable, when you and your brother clash over 'property'. oh well. You also make the cutest motions of waving your hands in front of your chest like a car wiper on turbo mode, when we offer you something you don't want (for eg., offering to carry you out of mama's arms, or feed you medicine.)
I love making you laugh.. you get so tickled when I make a mock-menacing approach and keep you in suspense as I pretend to eye your yummy hands and eventually 'chomp' down on them. You laugh in anticipation, when my fingers catch your feet and slowly make my way up your sides till I tickle you in the armpits..just today, you were in the playpen when i pressed my face against the netting and pretended to want to eat your chubby fingers up. We played hide and seek and you pulled yourself up to a stand, tiptoed with your eyes barely over the edge of the playpen and CHUCKLED as i shrunk in horror at being discovered by you. You were so amused when i sang 'Ol' McDonald' and hammed it up with exaggerated expressions while mooing or neighing. =7
In terms of physical development, you are a very good crawler now, who frequently pulls herself up to a stand. Only 8.6kg though..smaller than your brother was..but I suppose girls are usually smaller sized.
You've also improved your pincer grasp, and can pick up the Happy Baby melts i place on the high chair tray for you. :) You now have 4 teeth..2 lower teeth and 2 upper teeth, all in front. It makes you look even cuter when you smile, but that could just be the mum-in-me speaking.
You know, i was looking at some old baby pictures of myself the other day, and was startled to see how alike you are, at this stage. I always thought you looked more like your daddy, but there is an undeniable growing resemblance between you and me. God is so amazing..he manages to blend the features of two individuals within a single face, such that you look a little like your Daddy, and a little like me.
Sleep wise, it hasnt been the best month. You woke up soooo many times during the period when you were ill and your nose was stuffy, that I ended up very very grouchy from the lack of sleep. After offering myself as a pacifier, and then breaking the latch when you fell asleep for the nth time, I would ignore your cries and tell your Daddy "i've earned my 6am respite. Bring her out. I don't care." Sigh. I still can't bear to undertake sleep training though..so we are still at the stage where you continue your occupation of my bed. oh well..we'll see how things go. I got a heart attack a few times though, when I rushed in after hearing your cries for me (me having "me-time" out in the living room) and found you sitting at the edge of the bed, almost about to fall off. Sigh. I'm so grateful to your guardian angel for looking out for you.
I think i can go on talking about you forever, darling...we love you so much and will always treasure these early days with you.
Hugs, kisses and lots of love
Mama
A few days ago, I was thinking about this letter to you, thinking that I wouldn't have much to update..but today, just a day before you turn 10 months old, I realise I have sooo much to document I don't know where to start.
I had forgotten what 9+ month old babies were like.. but having spent a bit more time with you these two days, I am being reminded of what a cute time this is.
For one, your cognitive development has accelerated so rapidly that we are able to communicate beyond 'mum-mums' now. You call me, yes me (and not my boobs, or milk) "Meh meh" or "Mah Meh". I figured this out because you were calling out to me to carry you the other day when I was leaving for work. I think I might have mentioned this already, but you seem to be ever more clingy and endearing each day. The minute I step home from work, you will whine and go 'meh meh meh' until i carry you. Any attempt by others to take you off my hands will be swatted away by you, and when i do eventually hand you over so i can go shower, i cringe at your wails of protest and slink away to have a rapid shower.
Oh. Speaking of which, I feel soooo guilty leaving you behind these days. You'd initially be so excited when you see me in non-home clothes, at the door.. you'd kick and laugh and think we are going out.. but when I say bye and slowly walk away, you'd fall silent and give me the most resigned / forlorn look which breaks my heart. Sigh. Sometimes you'd even cry, and I can't help but postpone the farewell by asking Ida to bring you downstairs so you can walk me a little to the bus-stop or carpark. =S Just last night, you got 'jealous' (?) every time I hugged or kissed your brother. You'd pause, blink, and then crawl rapidly over and paw me..instantly going back to whatever captured your attention once I stop hugging korkor. Hmm.
Erm, back to cognitive development. You have a greater understanding of words and requests..your waves of 'bye' have evolved from an initial 'Hitler salute' to a slight fanning left-right-left with your hand, to an indonesian traditional dancer move. It is now a proper wave and you often do that everytime I carry you, as if to signal to everyone, "I'm going out with my mama now!" I tried to teach you to blow a kiss, but your mouth opens to eat your fingers every time I bring your hand to your mouth. It's hilarious.
You call everybody else, or address every other thing as a rather rude 'WEH.' or 'EH.' This can mean anything from 'Hello, cat', 'Hello, brother', 'Pass that', to 'i'm here'. =7
I thought of teaching you more commands, so we played the game of "Give mama" today..I placed a toy in your hand, then asked you to "Give mama". The first time you did it, i exclaimed and clapped and you were so pleased, though you looked as if you weren't sure what you did to please mama so. We repeated it a few times, and you started dropping the item on the floor. I withheld praise in those instances, so you'd understand that "Give" doesnt simply mean "giving it up" but "placing in XX's hands". You are a pretty smart cookie cos you got it in one session. Earlier tonight, before sleeping, I only had to say "Give mama" and you immediately dropped the vicks you were mouthing, into my hand. *grin* It made me laugh to see you comply automatically, a little startled with your mouth still open. This is proving to be a very useful command for me.
You've shown a great interest in books..you would make a lunge every time a book is in sight and yowl if we take it away from you for fear that you'd tear it apart..
As for temperament, i'm quite relieved to find you rather even-tempered...although I'm beginning to see flashes of personality..you've started crying when you don't get your way, when we take things away from you so you stop mouthing them etc etc..i am not looking forward to the inevitable, when you and your brother clash over 'property'. oh well. You also make the cutest motions of waving your hands in front of your chest like a car wiper on turbo mode, when we offer you something you don't want (for eg., offering to carry you out of mama's arms, or feed you medicine.)
I love making you laugh.. you get so tickled when I make a mock-menacing approach and keep you in suspense as I pretend to eye your yummy hands and eventually 'chomp' down on them. You laugh in anticipation, when my fingers catch your feet and slowly make my way up your sides till I tickle you in the armpits..just today, you were in the playpen when i pressed my face against the netting and pretended to want to eat your chubby fingers up. We played hide and seek and you pulled yourself up to a stand, tiptoed with your eyes barely over the edge of the playpen and CHUCKLED as i shrunk in horror at being discovered by you. You were so amused when i sang 'Ol' McDonald' and hammed it up with exaggerated expressions while mooing or neighing. =7
In terms of physical development, you are a very good crawler now, who frequently pulls herself up to a stand. Only 8.6kg though..smaller than your brother was..but I suppose girls are usually smaller sized.
You've also improved your pincer grasp, and can pick up the Happy Baby melts i place on the high chair tray for you. :) You now have 4 teeth..2 lower teeth and 2 upper teeth, all in front. It makes you look even cuter when you smile, but that could just be the mum-in-me speaking.
You know, i was looking at some old baby pictures of myself the other day, and was startled to see how alike you are, at this stage. I always thought you looked more like your daddy, but there is an undeniable growing resemblance between you and me. God is so amazing..he manages to blend the features of two individuals within a single face, such that you look a little like your Daddy, and a little like me.
Sleep wise, it hasnt been the best month. You woke up soooo many times during the period when you were ill and your nose was stuffy, that I ended up very very grouchy from the lack of sleep. After offering myself as a pacifier, and then breaking the latch when you fell asleep for the nth time, I would ignore your cries and tell your Daddy "i've earned my 6am respite. Bring her out. I don't care." Sigh. I still can't bear to undertake sleep training though..so we are still at the stage where you continue your occupation of my bed. oh well..we'll see how things go. I got a heart attack a few times though, when I rushed in after hearing your cries for me (me having "me-time" out in the living room) and found you sitting at the edge of the bed, almost about to fall off. Sigh. I'm so grateful to your guardian angel for looking out for you.
I think i can go on talking about you forever, darling...we love you so much and will always treasure these early days with you.
Hugs, kisses and lots of love
Mama
13 May 2012
Flowers
It's Mother's Day again. I was thinking back on last year's post, and wondering what there is to say. The recent lack of sleep coupled with the full-time work at home and in the office has reduced me to quite an intellectual zombie.
The minute I woke up this morning though, I realised I had so much to blog about.
"Although motherhood leaves you totally knackered with nary a moment to yourself, it also gives you the heartiest laughter and the most tender moments."
Christian bounched into my room at about 8am, shook my leg and went "Mama, wake up..mama wake up! It's daytime! The sun is out! Wake up, mama.." I groaned and buried my head in the pillow for a while more, but smiled to myself as he said, "There's flowers outside for you! It's mother's day! Daddy bought you flowers, come and see!"
He ran out of the room, and ran back in to find the still-supine mama half-conscious. I opened my eyes to see some fake Ikea flowers thrust under my face. "See, mama! Flowers for you! Daddy bought them!" I raised my brow cos i recognise them as the flowers I bought from Ikea many months ago. P came into the room and got quizzed.. "I have no idea where he got those from.."
Hah. He most probably remembers gifting me flowers last Mother's Day, and thought of doing the same this year. :)
(Just for the record, I got a carnation this year..and we brought the kids out to Ambush at J8 to eat together with the in-laws..)
He proceeded to pretend to be a lion cub, and went leaping off the foot of my bed to the mattress below, like a suicidal frog. He leapt over and over until I laughed at the kamikaze froglet, who had accidentally ruffled the bottom of my blanket in the midst of his training and took a very brief break to adjust my blanket to cover my feet, without me asking. AWww.. After I woke, he kept asking me to eat bread at the breakfast table even though I said i didn't want any. "There's bread, mama! Mama, you want bread? The bread is VERY nice..there's red bean you know, just like mine. Mama, you don't want bread? No? *pause for a few secs* Mama, you want me to choose the bread for you?" He went on until even my dad burst out laughing..I joked that he will make a good supermarket salesman in the future, whilst P commented that Ch's care for me is so "wu2 wei1 bu2 zhi4" =7
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We walked to the reservoir this morning, and Christian conquered his fear of the swing for the first time! Walking back, we passed many ixora bushes and i asked if he wanted Daddy to pluck an ixora flower so he could see and taste the nectar within. He immediately said "No, don't pluck! It will drop down by itself, then we can see the nectar.." His love for trees and flowers is so pure.
The minute I woke up this morning though, I realised I had so much to blog about.
"Although motherhood leaves you totally knackered with nary a moment to yourself, it also gives you the heartiest laughter and the most tender moments."
Christian bounched into my room at about 8am, shook my leg and went "Mama, wake up..mama wake up! It's daytime! The sun is out! Wake up, mama.." I groaned and buried my head in the pillow for a while more, but smiled to myself as he said, "There's flowers outside for you! It's mother's day! Daddy bought you flowers, come and see!"
He ran out of the room, and ran back in to find the still-supine mama half-conscious. I opened my eyes to see some fake Ikea flowers thrust under my face. "See, mama! Flowers for you! Daddy bought them!" I raised my brow cos i recognise them as the flowers I bought from Ikea many months ago. P came into the room and got quizzed.. "I have no idea where he got those from.."
Hah. He most probably remembers gifting me flowers last Mother's Day, and thought of doing the same this year. :)
(Just for the record, I got a carnation this year..and we brought the kids out to Ambush at J8 to eat together with the in-laws..)
He proceeded to pretend to be a lion cub, and went leaping off the foot of my bed to the mattress below, like a suicidal frog. He leapt over and over until I laughed at the kamikaze froglet, who had accidentally ruffled the bottom of my blanket in the midst of his training and took a very brief break to adjust my blanket to cover my feet, without me asking. AWww.. After I woke, he kept asking me to eat bread at the breakfast table even though I said i didn't want any. "There's bread, mama! Mama, you want bread? The bread is VERY nice..there's red bean you know, just like mine. Mama, you don't want bread? No? *pause for a few secs* Mama, you want me to choose the bread for you?" He went on until even my dad burst out laughing..I joked that he will make a good supermarket salesman in the future, whilst P commented that Ch's care for me is so "wu2 wei1 bu2 zhi4" =7
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We walked to the reservoir this morning, and Christian conquered his fear of the swing for the first time! Walking back, we passed many ixora bushes and i asked if he wanted Daddy to pluck an ixora flower so he could see and taste the nectar within. He immediately said "No, don't pluck! It will drop down by itself, then we can see the nectar.." His love for trees and flowers is so pure.
11 May 2012
"Mama lions have no hair"
Christian asked me to take the car instead of the private bus to work two mornings ago..and so I did. I sat right next to him and used the precious minutes in the car to go through the Eric Carle book on animal and the sounds they make (which he borrowed on his last visit to the library by the school).
for some reason i can't remember now, I was hamming it up and showed him how a lion's mane makes it look bigger, by lifting most of my hair in a gravity-defying look. He was tickled but said
'are you mama lion?'
me: 'yes!'
Ch: 'u r mama lion?? but mama lions don't have hair..'
It took me a few seconds to understand but I realized he was right..lionesses do not have manes. I clapped my hands over my mouth and exclaimed 'you are right! I forgot! who taught you that??'
Ch: teacher dxxx
(P says it seems like we can rest assured and hand over our son's education to teacher Dxxx now.)
for some reason i can't remember now, I was hamming it up and showed him how a lion's mane makes it look bigger, by lifting most of my hair in a gravity-defying look. He was tickled but said
'are you mama lion?'
me: 'yes!'
Ch: 'u r mama lion?? but mama lions don't have hair..'
It took me a few seconds to understand but I realized he was right..lionesses do not have manes. I clapped my hands over my mouth and exclaimed 'you are right! I forgot! who taught you that??'
Ch: teacher dxxx
(P says it seems like we can rest assured and hand over our son's education to teacher Dxxx now.)
09 May 2012
"Let's open a restaurant"
I overheard this Christian telling P this yesterday evening, as I came out of the shower -
"You know how to open a restaurant? You just press a button, and open the door, then you go in and go to the kitchen."
Oh, we were so amused.
"You know how to open a restaurant? You just press a button, and open the door, then you go in and go to the kitchen."
Oh, we were so amused.
07 May 2012
XXXXK XXXXXXXXR XXXW
We celebrated Mother's Day a week early, and went out for dinner at Hippopotamus, an established french steak house which recently opened its 1st outlet in Singapore.
At the end of the dinner, Christian remembered that the Suntec City water fountain which he had been clamouring to go visit but which we had put off by saying "dinner first". OOops..thank goodness he was tired and didn't pursue it doggedly. He just asked "we are going back to popo's house now?"
I took the chance to tell him the road name of where we live now. Given the recent kidnapping scares in Singapore, it struck me that this was a good time to teach him how to answer, should someone ask him where he lives (of course I told him he can only follow a policeman dressed in uniform, in a police car).
He tried so hard to get it right..the first two words were easy enough, but he kept saying "Hill" instead of "View". I tried to help him remember by doing the Victory sign, and reminding him of the phonetic sound of the letter V. He chanted it over and over again in the car till we all laughed. P was so proud of Ch, and said it must be because he understands the importance of what i'm trying to teach him.
True enough, Ch took it so seriously that when I started humming a tune right next to him, he chided with a slight frown - "don't sing..mama..I will forget.."
At the end of the dinner, Christian remembered that the Suntec City water fountain which he had been clamouring to go visit but which we had put off by saying "dinner first". OOops..thank goodness he was tired and didn't pursue it doggedly. He just asked "we are going back to popo's house now?"
I took the chance to tell him the road name of where we live now. Given the recent kidnapping scares in Singapore, it struck me that this was a good time to teach him how to answer, should someone ask him where he lives (of course I told him he can only follow a policeman dressed in uniform, in a police car).
He tried so hard to get it right..the first two words were easy enough, but he kept saying "Hill" instead of "View". I tried to help him remember by doing the Victory sign, and reminding him of the phonetic sound of the letter V. He chanted it over and over again in the car till we all laughed. P was so proud of Ch, and said it must be because he understands the importance of what i'm trying to teach him.
True enough, Ch took it so seriously that when I started humming a tune right next to him, he chided with a slight frown - "don't sing..mama..I will forget.."
06 May 2012
With a Pinch of Salt...
Read about this cafe two days ago and decided to go visit during Christian's Berries class today (since it's really near).
The owner was very friendly, the food was yummy and it was such a cosy place to chill out on a Sunday morning. P had the Black Lips Seafood Pasta (aptly named cos his lips ended up with black 'lipliner' and i had so much fun taking pictures of him!) whilst I had the Chicken Roulade which was stuffed full of soft, delectable mushrooms. The cafe reminded us a lot of "Miss Clarity" cafe, when it was first opened.
We shared a double scoop ice cream (sea salt caramel and almond & green tea with red bean) across the street at The Ice Cream Gallery after. As i was browsing through the magazines, we were thinking "AHHhh..this is life.."
So grateful to my parents and helper for taking care of the little one so we can have stolen moments like these. :)
The owner was very friendly, the food was yummy and it was such a cosy place to chill out on a Sunday morning. P had the Black Lips Seafood Pasta (aptly named cos his lips ended up with black 'lipliner' and i had so much fun taking pictures of him!) whilst I had the Chicken Roulade which was stuffed full of soft, delectable mushrooms. The cafe reminded us a lot of "Miss Clarity" cafe, when it was first opened.
We shared a double scoop ice cream (sea salt caramel and almond & green tea with red bean) across the street at The Ice Cream Gallery after. As i was browsing through the magazines, we were thinking "AHHhh..this is life.."
So grateful to my parents and helper for taking care of the little one so we can have stolen moments like these. :)
04 May 2012
The Singapore School System
Two days ago, a man named Ian Tan wrote about how the Singapore school system has become one of "irrelevant, unrealistic standards", that Singapore's pupils are forced to do sums "that are more useful in sifting for maths geniuses than genuinely imparting knowledge". He talked about how his wife who is a honours graduate and stays home to coach the children, is herself exasperated at the standards required of pupils today.
Children pushed so hard are highly stressed, sapped of intellectual curiosity and do not have time to enjoy their childhood because of the heavy load of homework.
My idol blogger Petunia Lee highlighted a response by Sarah Sum-Campbell to Ian Tan's letter, in which Sarah talked about how schools here make robots out of kids, "kicking the life and creativity out of them with a warped focus on achievment". Sigh.
Of course, my husband had to weigh in on this topic with his own views, which was published in 'Today', today (I post entries on this blog, whilst he prefers writing letters to the forum as part of his contribution to society (mainly on his pet topics))-
"Let's rethink the scoring system
I agree with the points made by Mr Ian Tan in "Standards are unrealistic" (May 2).
Our primary school system appears to be slowly but inexorably moving towards the South Korean model, where it is customary for children to head for "hagwons" (private tuition centres) after they finish with school for the day. The obsession with grades in South Korea has reached the point whereby Seoul had to impose a 10pm curfew on "hagwons" so that children could get adequate rest.
On its own, tuition serves a useful function by supplementing the public school system. The problem arises when curriculum is designed such that tuition becomes essential rather than additional.
If this is allowed to happen, one of the key underpinnings, meritocracy, of the education system would be undermined, as those whose parents can afford quality tuition would gain an unfair advantage over their peers. The tuition problem is compounded when the school admission system is score-based. Such a system motivates pupils to over-study so as to exceed a particular cut-off score.
As pupils try harder to beat the system, educators are compelled to stretch the curriculum's breadth and depth just to maintain status quo. Over time, the competition between pupils and educators to stay ahead of the other develops into a vicious cycle and creates a cramming culture.
The authorities should consider replacing the existing scoring system with a banding and balloting system, in which secondary schools and pupils are allocated a band (band 1, 2, etc). School admission would depend on the band a pupil attains at the Primary School Leaving Examination.
If eligible applications exceed the number of places available at a school, balloting takes place. Unsuccessful applicants would be given priority in their second school of choice.
A banding system would preserve meritocracy without encouraging unhealthy competition. Replacing absolute scores with bands takes away the pressure on pupils to over-study and allows curriculum to be designed around the average and not the top pupils.
Band-based admission may also create a more level playing field by allowing schools within the same band to access the same pool of students and vice versa.
Two decades ago, I attained a PSLE score of 275. Since then, no employer has asked me for my primary school results.
Rightfully so, for social and critical thinking skills are far more relevant to today's economy than the ability to memorise and do well on standardised tests. If our children could spend less time on studying, they would be in a better position to develop these valuable skills and Singapore would benefit."
Son, do we really have to migrate in order for you to have a proper childhood?
Children pushed so hard are highly stressed, sapped of intellectual curiosity and do not have time to enjoy their childhood because of the heavy load of homework.
My idol blogger Petunia Lee highlighted a response by Sarah Sum-Campbell to Ian Tan's letter, in which Sarah talked about how schools here make robots out of kids, "kicking the life and creativity out of them with a warped focus on achievment". Sigh.
Of course, my husband had to weigh in on this topic with his own views, which was published in 'Today', today (I post entries on this blog, whilst he prefers writing letters to the forum as part of his contribution to society (mainly on his pet topics))-
"Let's rethink the scoring system
I agree with the points made by Mr Ian Tan in "Standards are unrealistic" (May 2).
Our primary school system appears to be slowly but inexorably moving towards the South Korean model, where it is customary for children to head for "hagwons" (private tuition centres) after they finish with school for the day. The obsession with grades in South Korea has reached the point whereby Seoul had to impose a 10pm curfew on "hagwons" so that children could get adequate rest.
On its own, tuition serves a useful function by supplementing the public school system. The problem arises when curriculum is designed such that tuition becomes essential rather than additional.
If this is allowed to happen, one of the key underpinnings, meritocracy, of the education system would be undermined, as those whose parents can afford quality tuition would gain an unfair advantage over their peers. The tuition problem is compounded when the school admission system is score-based. Such a system motivates pupils to over-study so as to exceed a particular cut-off score.
As pupils try harder to beat the system, educators are compelled to stretch the curriculum's breadth and depth just to maintain status quo. Over time, the competition between pupils and educators to stay ahead of the other develops into a vicious cycle and creates a cramming culture.
The authorities should consider replacing the existing scoring system with a banding and balloting system, in which secondary schools and pupils are allocated a band (band 1, 2, etc). School admission would depend on the band a pupil attains at the Primary School Leaving Examination.
If eligible applications exceed the number of places available at a school, balloting takes place. Unsuccessful applicants would be given priority in their second school of choice.
A banding system would preserve meritocracy without encouraging unhealthy competition. Replacing absolute scores with bands takes away the pressure on pupils to over-study and allows curriculum to be designed around the average and not the top pupils.
Band-based admission may also create a more level playing field by allowing schools within the same band to access the same pool of students and vice versa.
Two decades ago, I attained a PSLE score of 275. Since then, no employer has asked me for my primary school results.
Rightfully so, for social and critical thinking skills are far more relevant to today's economy than the ability to memorise and do well on standardised tests. If our children could spend less time on studying, they would be in a better position to develop these valuable skills and Singapore would benefit."
Son, do we really have to migrate in order for you to have a proper childhood?
02 May 2012
Mastitis (this post is not for the men)
I'm in the midst of my first bout of mastitis, since giving birth to Calista. I had it about three times, during my b/feeding journey with Christian, and thought myself wiser this time round. Too bad it had to strike once before my imminent weaning.
Just to jog the memory when I read this in future, my boobies felt lumpy and very tender/painful in the morning. I was hoping it was just blocked ducts that could wait till I got home and treated myself with a boiling hot compress, but by the time I did yoga during lunchtime, I started feeling the familiar body ache and slight chills. It progressed to a full-blown headache, fever, body ache and freezing hands by 4pm. Oh how i wished I didn't take medical leave last week for my wisdom tooth extraction. I am far too embarrassed to go off early due to a medical reason AGAIN, and so have decided to sit out my misery in office, bundled up in a shawl and jacket.
Of course, my mother has to scare me with a story she came across in the Chinese tabloid, of how this 30-something year old woman with a 4 month old baby had fever, went to see the doc, still went to work, and passed away after 4 days. Her husband thought she had recovered in bed, but she had apparently gone for some time. =S
Just to jog the memory when I read this in future, my boobies felt lumpy and very tender/painful in the morning. I was hoping it was just blocked ducts that could wait till I got home and treated myself with a boiling hot compress, but by the time I did yoga during lunchtime, I started feeling the familiar body ache and slight chills. It progressed to a full-blown headache, fever, body ache and freezing hands by 4pm. Oh how i wished I didn't take medical leave last week for my wisdom tooth extraction. I am far too embarrassed to go off early due to a medical reason AGAIN, and so have decided to sit out my misery in office, bundled up in a shawl and jacket.
Of course, my mother has to scare me with a story she came across in the Chinese tabloid, of how this 30-something year old woman with a 4 month old baby had fever, went to see the doc, still went to work, and passed away after 4 days. Her husband thought she had recovered in bed, but she had apparently gone for some time. =S
01 May 2012
AAAAH!
Our dear Calista has taken to a high-pitched shriek, as a way of calling out to people.
I was playing with her on my lap one day, and was still singing silly songs when she suddenly stared far away to my left side and went 'AAH!' I was slightly puzzled, but continued focusing on her until I suddenly sensed a presence in the living room and was startled when I turned my head and saw Christian sitting wordlessly on the floor, a little zombified right after waking up from his nap. She was calling out to her brother.
This morning, when she woke at 6-something am as she is wont to do, she did the usual exploration of the bed while I ignored her, before starting to crawl resolutely to the foot of her bed, where her dad is sleeping on a mattress on the floor (we decided that this was the best sleeping arrangement..i get space to nurse Calista and P gets peace at night and a good sleep.) She paused before plunging to the mattress below, saw that her father was still sleeping and motionless, and went "UH!" There was no reaction, but another "AH!" did the trick. He stirred, and she clapped her hands.
^_^
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